There are many reality make-over shows these days. They are very entertaining to watch and make you feel better about your own situation. The solution to the problems of the subject of the show always seem so obvious to you as the outsider but the subject always seems clueless. I think I started this blog to get an outside perspective on my own thoughts and issues and perhaps get some insight on things that I am clueless about but is so obvious to the reader. Even in my last blog I made an excuse for every problem why an obvious solution would not work out allready assuming I get feedback that people would try to solve my problems. Funnny thing happened though. I got feedback and it scared me!
I think solutions to our problems are known to us... we are just scared of following through and solving the problem. So we make excuses why we can't follow through on the obvious solutions. (Which I did in my last blog.) Do I enjoy being the martyr (as my husband tells me) or am I scared of the life I might have if I follow through and actually get the things I think will make me happier. Maybe I'm scared I'll get there and my life won't be perfect and I'll still be unhappy. Like will I feel better about myself if I lost 20lbs or will I still have those same body issues no mater what? And who will I be if I'm a size 6 if so much of my identity for so long has been an overweight person. Or if I go get a job and miraculously am able to have it all... a job and wonderful children... will I lose my identity I created as a stay at home mom and will my relationships with my other SAHM friends change?
I must not want the change bad enough to sacrafice the good things that I have right now.
I may just be creating drama to break up the monotony of my day.
I might be scared of change.
(sorry for all the misspellings)
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